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Tuesday, November 6, 2007

Playing with the cool kids

I was never one of the cool kids. Ever. I have always marched to my own beat and that seems to have worked pretty well, but I was certainly teased (tormented really) a lot. I matured faster than most kids my age. I was taller than my 3rd grade teacher, I started wearing a bra and got zits in 4th grade, and started my period in 5th grade. And I wore glasses and had unfashionably wavy hair. That didn't help any. I was awkward for sure. In fact Ugly Betty comes to mind (no wonder I love her).

Occasionally, I would get invited to hang out with the cool, popular kids, but I would get teased or picked on or have arguments with them. And those friendships never developed.

Fast forward 25 years. I feel like I have been invited to play with the cool kids in Las Vegas. And they all seem to know each other. And speak their own crazy language. And have all their inside jokes. And I am having flashbacks to being the awkward kid that was mistakenly (or worse, purposely) invited to the cool kids' party.

Now that is what the irrational, emotional child part of me is thinking. The rational, logical adult knows that will not be the case at all. I have been reassured by many people that this is a very open, come-as-you-are kind of group and that people will like me just the way I am, coffee-stained teeth and all. :D And remember this is a like a coming out party for me so a wee bit of anxiety is perfectly in order.

Oh, and btw, I don't think of myself as an Ugly Betty at all. In fact I think I'm kinda hot! Heh.

No, I don't look like America Ferrera. My hair just isn't that long any more. :D