More on people who get it

Talking with people who understand what it means to have your husband deployed was just amazing. I feel like I have had an experience that can't undo. Like awakening.

It is really nice to be around people who know what it is like to have a loved one at war. Who know what it is like to have people ask uneducated questions about the war and repeatedly say "I don't know how you do it." People who know what it is like to have people that you know primarily online. I don't have to explain myself to them. Because they already know, they already understand.

And that level of understanding is just breathtaking. Especially, when for the last 22 months, I swear I have not met another person who gets it.

I was thinking about my earlier statement that this trip may have been more refreshing and spiritually energizing than the retreat. I figured out why. The people I met in Las Vegas are the community I most identify with. The wonderful women I met at the retreat are the community that help me cope, but they don't really understand me.

Answers to life's persistent questions ...

So yesterday I opened the floor to questions about Vegas. Here are my answers and I am sticking to them.

Reasa asked: (1) So you really are opening this up? (2) Is it scary to think of what people might ask?

BW: (1) Yes. (2) Nah, but of course, I don't have to actually answer anything I don't want to.

Non-Essential Equipment (who is probably the one reader who I would expect to ask the MOST off-the-wall question) asked: (1) What did you do with all the hooker flyers that you were handed in the street? (2) And what blogger didn't look like their online photo?

BW: (1) I never walked along the strip, not even one step so I didn't get any flyers. Cabs, cabs, cabs. AWTM would have a more interesting answer to this question. (2) You mean besides me? ;-) Right off hand, I would say Christian Lowe (and if I link to the guy any more, he is going to think I am stalking him) because in the photos he put out he was all covered up. A close second must be Telfon Don from the picture on his blog, but I had seen other pictures of him elsewhere (such as Cool, Calm & Collected, Badgers Forward) so I recognized him instantly.

Andi: What, exactly, was that we saw in the cab ride on the way to the airport?

BW: I was IMing with one of our fellow attendees on Sunday evening and described the scene this way: "A homeless, obese, black woman clean herself with the newspapers." The response: "image ... I ... can ... live ... without ..."

Here's what really happened. Saturday morning, about 11 AM, Andi and I share a cab to the airport, when we stop at a light. I am sitting facing Andi and I become insanely distracted by the sight of this woman described above standing on the sidewalk facing away from the street. She is wearing some sort of white terry-cloth strapless wrap garment and is taking newspapers from the free ads bin, wadding them up and rubbing herself all over -- and I mean ALL over, her ALL appeared to be getting quite clean as well -- and then throwing the used papers into a nice little, gathering pile in the bushes.

I don't shock easily and quite frankly, I did not find this shocking. It was just not what I was expecting to see on a Saturday morning cab ride to the airport. A girl's gotta do, what a girl's gotta do. ;-)

LAW: about the Jude Law guy.....

BW: OK. This is pretty straight forward and not much more to tell. AWTM and Sarah and I start heading over to do our little panel. AWTM is taking random photos of people, uh, just cuz she can I guess. And there are these 2 guys standing around in the bloggers lounge area maybe 30 feet away from us. And I just keep looking even as we turn the corner and start walking away.

"Hey, that guy looks like Jude Law," I say to the ladies. And they slow down, and look at each other with disbelieving looks on their faces.

"Uh, no, he didn't, BW," they chuckle at me. "Oh, wait. It has been 8 months since you've seen Jack Bauer. That explains it."

I swear that the guy actually did look like Jude Law. But then I could have just been tired, and 30 feet away, and in serious need of seeing my husband. The countdown continues.


So that's about it. Anyone else? Got any more?

You got questions?

I might have answers.

I am sure some of you might have questions about my trip to Las Vegas. If you post questions in the comments, I will (maybe) attempt to answer them.

Disclaimer: Site owner reserves the right to refuse to answer any question on any grounds, and the site owner further reserves the right to, um, adjust the truth to protect the identity of innocent victims.

A glimpse of the future

At one point on Friday night, I was listening to a conversation between Bill Roggio and Christian Lowe, both having done embedded reporting, thinking that this is the exact kind of the conversation that Jack Bauer would have been completely in the middle of. I can even picture his body language and hand gestures.

I just shook my head. It was like Jack was there, and I was with him. And everything was the way it is supposed to be.

So accidentally cool

I'm watching Happy Feet and the greatest line ever for a person who marches to the beat of her own drummer has got to be:

This guy is so accidentally cool!

Here's a picture of me hanging at The Long War Journal booth with Bill Roggio's helmet on. Those are my sunglasses and sparkling white teeth.

Summing it up

AWTM summed it up so well in her post over at SpouseBuzz this morning.

But I wanted you to know, I love meeting and reuniting with my fellow mil-bloggers, there is nothing like the bond we share. We understand when the recently returned are abnormally quiet during a dinner. We understand when our injured friend drops something inadvertently in the middle of a conversation.

During dinner the subject of planning a funeral came up, having the dress uniform in the back of the closet hanging just in case........we hardly had to have a conversation about it. We all knew as we have all done it, or something very similar.....Normally, I can sit through this conversation, but I got up and wandered off on this night. I never had to explain myself to my fellow bloggers. they understood.

I am not alone.

I am not crazy.

I am not abnormal. ...

Enhanced. My life, is truly enhanced by these people and the knowledge, understanding and ability to share a common experience.

And at the end of the night we raised our glasses to those we have lost, and those we may loose soon.

You are amazing.

Thank You so much folks you rejuvenated my spirit.

A bloody beginning, a bloody end

I went to pick up the doggies yesterday. And Bear was so excited to see me that he was jumping up and down while the lady was trying to put on the collars.

Dog head versus human mouth. That battle never turns out well for the human mouth. The lady put her tooth through her lip. Big bloody mess.

So Bear helped me start off the trip with a bloody trip to the vet and helped end the trip by sending someone to the hospital.

Uggghhh!

The party's over

I got back to my room shortly before 2 AM.

Secret: I don't drink and I don't smoke.

I'm just born obnoxious. AWTM is going to have to retract her "so sweet" comment about me. It just isn't true. If you think I am sweet, you just haven't gotten to know me yet. Let me put it this way: I held my own against Uncle Jimbo.

There are so many things to relate so you get a stream of consciousness.

Panel was good. I guess that was the original reason for me coming out here.

I didn't get around to many of the booths of the expo. I was working quite a bit. Schmoozing the best I could.

Something about a guy who I still think was a dead ringer for Jude Law, but Sarah and AWTM said, "Uh, NO!!!" Hmmm. It has been over 8 months, ladies, give me a break.

I may or may not have done any of the things other people write about me. And I am likely to deny any photographic evidence others claim to be me. I will say all my clothes did stay on. :D

At the milblogging after party at the Tequila Bar at Bally's, I got everyone who stopped by to sign postcards for Jack Bauer. I filled up three cards. Here's the list (and I apologize for anyone whose name I didn't get quite right. Geez, people. Learn to write legibly).

• Mary Katherine Ham
• Katie Favazza
• AWTM
• Roxie from DoD
• Ed Driscoll from PJM
• Jaime from DoD
• Steve Epstein (friend of Jimbo's who actually seemed really normal. How odd is that?)
• Steve Schippert from Threats Watch
• Teflon Don
• Sasha from Threats Watch
• Ward Carroll
• Loree Hirschman
• Blackfive
• Uncle Jimbo
• Christian Lowe (who was very attentive and actually kissed me on the cheek.)
• Bill Roggio
• Paul Hanusz
• Sarah
• Ali Eteraz
• Chuck
• Michael Totten
• Jack Army
• Jill Army
• Andi
• Steve from Vodka pundit
• Carla and Jim from Some Soldier's Mom
• Jack Holt
• Vernon from Threats Watch
• me

That's quite the list. And before I forget, I also met The Wolf from Blackfive and Glenn Reynolds from Instapundit.

That's it for now. My throat is sore from yelling to hear myself. I am tired.

And it was a really good thing to go on that retreat last weekend. But I think the last days might be just as beneficial. Maybe more so. ;-)

OMG! What a day

I am still wiped out from yesterday. No one warned me that working a "trade show" was going to be hard work. I was so tired by the end of the day I didn't even make it to the "pajama party." We'll just have to see what AWTM, Sarah, and Andi have to say about that.

Let's see, I met Teflon Don, Christian Lowe, Michael Goldfarb. And probably 100 other people. I can't remember everything. And I was trying to do actual work while I was there.

Sarah liveblogged the first milblog panel: Hey, What's a Milblog? The panel was moderated by Christian Lowe from Defense Tech.

• Steve Schippert from ThreatsWatch.org
• Bill Roggio from The Long War Journal
• Uncle Jimbo from Blackfive
• Eric Egland, running for Congress in California

Excellent. I won't summarize what has already been written by Sarah. I really liked Bill Roggio's comment that a milblog isn't just a warblog, but the community includes spouses and significant others. Classy guy.

Sarah also liveblogged the second miblog panel: To Blog or Not to Blog: Milbloggers, the DoD, and the Media.

• Moderator: Ward Carroll from Military.com
• Matt Burden from Blackfive
• Michael Totten from Middle East Journal
• Jack Holt, the DoD blogger outreach coordinator
• Claude Chafin, from the White House

Coming up today, From the Front and Meanwhile, Back on the Homefront. And more people to meet. Very exciting, if tiring, time here.

My thoughts exactly

So last night I did hook up with a bunch of bloggers over at the Luxor.

AWTM, of course, put up a post on who she met. The title of the post was exactly what I was thinking last night. "There are a lot of hookers in Las Vegas, or people just like dressing like whores and trannies. (Or is it spelled trannys)."

For the record, it would be "trannies." I think it is going to be a couple of days filled with writers correcting each other mid-sentence over everything from spelling to flaws in logic.

Other bloggers I met include Andi (SpouseBuzz), Carla (Some Soldier's Mom), Matt (Blackfive), Uncle Jimbo (Blackfive), Bill (Long War Journal), Michael Totten, Armed Liberal (Winds of Change), Chuck (From My Position). And a whole bunch of other people. Everyone was pretty much how I expected. Well, except that Chuck was much more tame. ;-)

For work or for pleasure?

On the flight out here, I was standing in line for the bathroom when a flight attendant asked me if I was going to Las Vegas for work or for pleasure.

I am doing both actually. I am here to speak on the panel about blogging and to meet new people and hang out and have fun. But I am also here to do stuff with the super secret job, which is also fun.

That got me thinking. Why can't work also be fun? I don't think anything I call the "pesky day job" suggests that I am having fun at it.

I took care of my business and headed back to my seat and promptly updated my resume.

Let's see what other contacts I can make in the next few days.

I should have just stayed home ...

From work.

I called in sick this morning and should have just said I wasn’t coming in at all. Instead I decided to go to work before going to the airport. I rushed around this morning trying to make sure I had everything I needed. Cell phone charger – check. iPod charger – check. Cell phone – check. Toothbrush – check.

I get my bags and the doggies in the car and take off. A few minutes into the drive I turn around to check on the doggies. Bear is bleeding all over the back seat. I pull over to see how bad it really is and whether a detour to the vet is in order. I find the source of the bleeding; Bear has a laceration on his right hind paw that was bleeding pretty good. He must have gotten while jumping around getting himself all worked up about his trip to day care. I wipe away the blood and could see that it while small, it was deep and probably did need something to close it up. I call the vet to give them a heads up that I am coming in.

Luckily, the vet’s office is not particularly busy and they take Bear back right away. He just needed glue. No stitches. Phew! One less thing for me to worry about on this trip.

With the doggies dropped off, I drove to work and to clean the mess up in the back seat. I remembered I had some Armor All leather wipes in the trunk. “Maybe they would still be damp enough to clean up the mess,” I think to myself.

In the parking lot at work, I get the wipes from the trunk and open the passenger side door. WHAP!! My head collides with the doorframe. Stars appear. “Damn, that’s going to hurt for a wile.” I recover myself and set about the business of cleaning up dried doggie blood off my leather seats. The wipes aren’t wet enough to the job. It will just have to wait until I get back, then it will be good and dried on permanently. Oh well.

As I head to the office front door, I realize that I don’t have my badge with me since I switched my purse for my new computer bag. Instead of calling security, I just wait until someone came out. I bypass the other “security measures” and head toward my cubicle.

“Shit! I forgot my Dramamine.” I get motion sick on planes now that I am old. By this time it is already 12:30 PM. I will need to leave around 3:00 PM to get to the airport in time get through security and to get online so I can download the work I need to do on the plane.

And that’s where I sit writing this post in MS Word. Because the Wi-Fi isn’t working at the airport. So now I have to edit the old-fashioned way: pen and paper. (Luckily, I had the foresight to print the document. Note to self: Must pack thumb drive when traveling and download documents BEFORE getting to the airport.) Then I will have to make all the corrections to the electronic version later. What a PITA.

So AWTM had a problem with her brakes, Sarah has morning sickness, Andi is having travel issues, and I have a lump on my head. It can only get better from here. Right?

And btw, I obviously made it to Vegas. And am safely in the hotel, connected to the Internet. Now I need to get out and have some fun.

Later.

Vegas Packing List

So what does a butterfly take to the Blog World & New Media Expo in Sin City?

• Polar bear flannel pajama bottoms in order to have something appropriate to wear to a Pajama(s Media) party. I can't decide between the Blackfive t-shirt or the Badgers Forward tank top.
• The Blog of War: Front-Line Dispatches from Soldiers in Iraq and Afghanistan. The copy Jack Bauer sent back months ago still has gray talc sand all over it, but I will see if a few of the authors (Blackfive, AWTM, Sarah) might be so inclined to sign it.
• The Sandbox: Dispatches from Troops in Iraq and Afghanistan. I believe at least one of the contributors (Teflon Don) will be there.
• Listerine Whitening Quick Dissolving Strips. :D
• MacBook with pretty new bag and pink neoprene cover.
• iPod.
• Cell phone.
• Cards.

I will do my best to blog all about the excitement as it is happening, but I hope to be having the fun not just typing about other people having it.

Later!

Playing with the cool kids

I was never one of the cool kids. Ever. I have always marched to my own beat and that seems to have worked pretty well, but I was certainly teased (tormented really) a lot. I matured faster than most kids my age. I was taller than my 3rd grade teacher, I started wearing a bra and got zits in 4th grade, and started my period in 5th grade. And I wore glasses and had unfashionably wavy hair. That didn't help any. I was awkward for sure. In fact Ugly Betty comes to mind (no wonder I love her).

Occasionally, I would get invited to hang out with the cool, popular kids, but I would get teased or picked on or have arguments with them. And those friendships never developed.

Fast forward 25 years. I feel like I have been invited to play with the cool kids in Las Vegas. And they all seem to know each other. And speak their own crazy language. And have all their inside jokes. And I am having flashbacks to being the awkward kid that was mistakenly (or worse, purposely) invited to the cool kids' party.

Now that is what the irrational, emotional child part of me is thinking. The rational, logical adult knows that will not be the case at all. I have been reassured by many people that this is a very open, come-as-you-are kind of group and that people will like me just the way I am, coffee-stained teeth and all. :D And remember this is a like a coming out party for me so a wee bit of anxiety is perfectly in order.

Oh, and btw, I don't think of myself as an Ugly Betty at all. In fact I think I'm kinda hot! Heh.

No, I don't look like America Ferrera. My hair just isn't that long any more. :D

I promise I am not a freak OR I'm just your kind of freak

Sarah posted this over at her blog. LMAO! That being my JLo-sized "A". :D :D :D :D

Your teeth are fine.

Dear Butterfly Wife,

I have no idea what you're talking about with needing to whiten your teeth. I certainly didn't notice that when we met. I was too busy feeling like a fool because I couldn't figure out how to read the menu at the coffee shop. I can never read coffee shop menus, and since I didn't want to look like a dunce, I pretended that I didn't really need to eat any breakfast. So I starved and then made my husband take me to a gas station on the way home and get me some food.

I didn't notice your teeth, I just noticed that my husband, who generally doesn't like conversation with anyone, seemed to be having a good time talking to you about Iraq. That's an awful big compliment in his book.

And you're wearing make up in Vegas? Crap. I am so out of my league here.

Oh and also, the weight thing? Hogwash. From reading your blog, I expected you to weigh 300 lbs when I met you. You look great. Don't be so hard on yourself.

Can't wait to see you again in Vegas!
Sarah

P.S. You need to copy this post and put it up on your own blog so your readers can hear somebody saying that you have nice teeth and a normal sized butt. They're going to picture you as a freak of nature if they go by your description of yourself.

So there you go. I don't weight 300 pounds and my teeth are fairly white and straight (thank you junior high braces). And I wear make-up. And I even shower once in a while. And I wear clean clothes. Not so much of a freak.

Geez. I guess I'll just have to post pictures from Vegas. More proof that I actually exist.

I'm soo vain, I probably think this post is about me ...

Nothing quite like the prospect of meeting a bunch of strangers that I supposedly "know" in some fashion to be a sufficient motivator to make me improve my appearance. Yes, I am vain. And I am going to be Vain in Vegas.

In recent weeks, I have purchased new make-up -- foundation, powder, eyeshadow, more lip glosses -- and actually started wearing it to work.

I've got a new 'do -- sassy -- and will get it trimmed up and touch up the highlights -- red and blonde -- before the trip.

I started using Listerine Whitening Quick Dissolving Strips. And boy do they work. In less than a week, I have probably taken off two years of coffee drinking; still have another week to go. And they are soooo much better than other strips that aren't quick-dissolving. I highly recommend them.

Now if I could only lose 50 pounds and a couple of dress sizes and get a whole new wardrobe, well, I would be in heaven. But that just isn't going to happen.

So I will just have to be happy with whiter teeth. :D

The Exciting News ...

The exciting news is that I will be attending the Blog World & New Media Expo in Las Vegas November 8 and 9.

Actually, I will sitting on a panel about blogging from the Home Front as part of the milblog panels being put together by military.com. There will be four milblog panels discussing a range of issues related to milblogging.

Here are the panels:

HEY, WHAT’S A MILBOG?
Moderator: Christian Lowe
Thursday, November 8 (1:30 – 2:30)

TO BLOG OR NOT TO BLOG:
MILBLOGGERS,THE DOD AND THE MEDIA
Moderator: Ward Carroll
Thursday, November 8 (2:45 – 3:45)

FROM THE FRONT
Moderator: Ward Carroll
Friday, November 9 (10:15 – 11:45)

MEANWHILE, BACK ON THE HOMEFRONT
Moderator: Andi Hurley
Friday, November 9 (1:30 – 2:30)

Some pretty exciting emails in my inbox to say the least, as the likes of Blackfive and Uncle Jimbo, Chuck Z., Jack Army, John Noonan from Op-for, Michael Yon (via video feed from Iraq), and Some Soldier's Mom -- just to name a few -- will be panelists too. I've never sat on a panel for anything before. This should be fun.

It will be good to meet some other milbloggers and to learn a whole lot more about blogging in general. Who knows, maybe I will come back and get me a design or something crazy like that.

See you in Vegas, baby! ;-)