Tuesday, October 16, 2007

How much is too much?

Worrying. I am worrying about worrying Jack Bauer too much. And I know he does the same. We like to worry.

I know every couple is different, but where is that magical line that should or should not be crossed when it comes to telling your deployed loved one about what is going on at home?

I've had a couple medical scares in recent days. I am not sure what is going on. (I'll let you all know when I know.) But I am keeping my worry-wart warrior informed. Would I have told him about this 6 months ago when he was closer to the tip of the spear? Probably. But I think that is just the kind of couple we are. Not that I think there is a singular right way.

I got to thinking about how much our guys tell us. Before he left, we agreed that he could tell me anything. And that he would tell me everything he was able to.

So I asked. "Have you told me everything I should know?"

"No." Further discussion ensued. Nothing he said surprised me. I'm not worried about what he told me. It is all in the past. And those aspects that may be carried over, the lasting effects of combat, we will deal with together, just like everything else.

On the spectrum of deployment worry sharing, is there a finer line between needless and needful worrying than when he is by my side? And how in the world do I determine where that line falls?